Rugby: the essentials for survival

In Gaillard country, rugby is a religion and if you're one of those people who don't know much about it, you're likely to find yourself lost at CA Brive matches or during discussions on the subject! So, just for you, here are the essentials for survival:

1. A rugby match is: 15 players, 7 substitutes, 80 minutes and 3 halves (the 3rd half is for the more festive amongst you).
2. The aim of the game is to score a try (not a goal, be careful what you say). A try is scored when a player puts the ball behind the line.
3. A forwards is when the player with the ball loses control of it and drops it towards the opposing goal line. Hand passes are made towards the back. In the back, in the tail, in the back, behind what.
4. A drop is a kick that has been dropped but not hurt.
5. When players strangely fit shoulder to shoulder, there's nothing emotional about it. It's a scrum. The players are pushing to try and win the ball back (maybe they're exchanging cooking recipes at the same time, we don't know).
6. Offside: pretend you understand.